Apr 5, 2014

Trying

I am currently reading a book by T. Harv Eker “Secrets of the Millionaire Mind”. There is a part where he was comparing the terms “trying to be rich”, “want to be rich” and “committed to be rich”. I suddenly dawn on me that I am doing almost everything in my life “trying” and not enough “wanting” or “committing”.

At the age of 45, my financial state is not ideal and I even have to struggle to buy a government apartment in my country where most of the people at my age are already having good assets. My life is comfortable now, meaning that I can afford to live my live comfortably but not rich to a level that can afford big ticket items or major investments. I felt I am trapped in my current comfortable state.

Similarly, it also dawned on me that my running is also at a comfortable state. I am able to run anything at 50km comfortable and at reasonable speed, but I am not able bring myself to finish many races of longer distances.

For both events, I am somehow stuck at the comfortable state and has major problems jumping out of this zones towards a more ideal but challenging state. I know very well that both challenges need me to CHANGE MY MINDSET FROM “TRYING” TO “COMMITTING”.

In my life, I want to be rich and I am able to devote some energy and time to exploring opportunities on alternative ways to improve my wealth, but almost all the time the result is NO FOLLOWUP because of some excuses. My “trying” has stopped because I have met with some obstacles.

Similarly in running. I always experience extreme fatigue and stomach problem when running 100km trail and in many races, I DNFed because of various excuses I used, and thus stop “trying”. I can only blame myself on hindsight why I have not been more “COMMITTED” to completing the race and push on. When things become tough along the race route, my mind and body will play tricks on me and I cannot pull up any positive thought out of my mind. My mind becomes almost 100% negative and I started to grab anything inside or outside as a source of justification and excuse for why I need to slow down! walk! or quit. In races which I have completed, I remember that I have companion who push me and avoid my own negativity to overcome me.

The upcoming UTMF has been a daunting event for me and I am having a lot of difficulties getting myself “committed” to even to be there at the starting line. I need to make non refundable payments that slowly but surely push me towards the start. But even if I am now forced to be there at the Start line, would I be able to finish this race? Or rather, how COMMITTED am I to want to finish this race. I know that I need to expect the worst of the worst in terms of physical and mental for this race, but even with all the expectations, it is a different thing to experience it there and push myself in all these adversaries.

In my financial state, I can see a lot of opportunities around me that can give me financial wealth but again I sort of know that I am still not willing to “COMMIT” to doing what it takes to follow through and sacrifices all to finish it.

Why?

Jan 28, 2014

Jan 23, 2014

Jan 22, 2014

Jan 22, 2014

Positive Reinforcement during Ultra

1. You will need to accept that you will finish your ultra in extremely terrible condition. All runners including elite and injured runners will finish in shitty condition, and that is very normal.

2. Everyone vomits and hit the wall somewhere in the race, even the elites. Remember that SK and Yim also vomited and bonked but they push on and even try to run thereafter. Vomits and bonking will pass soon and it is cyclical. Look for positive signs of recovery than to dwell on negatives.

3. Your speed should be the speed that let you arrive the next checkpoint before the cut off. Don’t aim to arrive any earlier. Push too fast will bonk you out sooner.

4. Ultra is 90% mental! The mentally strong will prevail.

5. Run with someone rather than alone. Let someone push you for a while. You did it in HK100 2013 with a Malaysian and HK runner successfully, and in Dalian 100. You never succeed by running alone.

6. Force to eat and drink every 2 hours. Take salt pills every 2 hours.

7. Your job is to cross the finish line in whatever conditions. Think about that sprinter who staggered through to finish line crying hard with his father when he sprained his legs. Look at how emotional and fulfilling for everyone if you can cross that finish line despite being is the worst conditions!

8. Remember that ultra for me is more of a mental game than a physical game. You cannot be the strongest and fastest runner but you must prove to yourself that you are the mentally fittest. Quitting is not an option.

Jan 22, 2014

Daily Ritual

I need to start setting a daily ritual that get some positive order into my life.

1. Wake up at specified time.
2. Push up 50, plank 2 times to failure, wall sit 2 times to failure.
3. Meditation 30 mins
4. Run
5. Bath and wash and dress
6. Positive reinforcement
7. Revise day plan
8. Breakfast

Dec 6, 2013

Dec 2, 2013

Thinking clearly

I had a coffee discussion with Mr Zhang last Saturday morning and I ran through with him some of my current projects.

As usual, I am to get a eager listening ear from him, but more importantly I can see the difference in how different we think through issues. Zhang is able to listen and immediate cut through the gist of the matter to identify what is key and what are not. On the other hand, I am not able to do this. Zhang’s background in Mathematics and statistics contribute to his ability look at issues very objectively and his management skills and experiences further helped him in his judgement and decisions.

For me, I have always attribute my weakness to not able to think through ideas widely, deeply and clearly enough. I think I hate the entire thinking process itself and maybe due to my nature, prefer to get things moving and done and leave thinking to later or to someone else.

This has got to change.

Nov 29, 2013
I love and hate this evening light.  When I was in elementary and secondary schools, this light means I have so much homework and not enough time, or there is a test tomorrow and I have not covered enough.  Now, I love the tranquility and warmth this light gives me.  This is my 15 minutes of fear and comfort.

I love and hate this evening light. When I was in elementary and secondary schools, this light means I have so much homework and not enough time, or there is a test tomorrow and I have not covered enough. Now, I love the tranquility and warmth this light gives me. This is my 15 minutes of fear and comfort.

Nov 28, 2013

Week 1 Session 3

Completed 15km on thread mill in gym in 93min. Running on thread mill is relatively more difficult than on the road outdoor for some unknown reasons. Maybe it is the lack of wind, or the different muscles used. I stopped to do walking and slow jogging 3 times to recover. I do not feel tired but just too bored to do that same motion over and over.

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